Ricky the Mozzie Slayer

Thursday morning

The birds are tweeting, lawnmowers are humming, in the distance a holiday jet passes overhead….you guessed it, I’m in residence on the bench again.  OOh, there goes  a siren, actually I wish they’d pipe down a bit, those birds are making a racket!  The only problem with this is that it’s sooooo bright I’m having difficulty seeing my screen even with the brightness turned right up and I keep loosing my trusty arrow.  Also in an attempt to scoop some fresh bird poop off the bench I picked up a the nearest leaf to use and pricked my thumb, it being a holly leaf and all!  But I could really get usd to this.  I’ll sit here all day, blogging, surfing the net, and sipping Twinnings tea, wot  a life.  I could be a ‘Lady that lunches’, except I don’t think Rick would be too pleased.

Talking of Rick, it’s that time of year again when the mozzies come out in force and Rick does his balletict poses to keep up with them and splat the blighters.  Normally he’ll go around with rolled up paper or a magazine leaving fetching coloured splats and smeers on the wall and ceiling where mozzie goo and ink have mixed, but this year I had a cunning plan and insisted on buying a twin pack of attractively coloured plastic fly swotters in Ikea the last time we visited.  What a difference.  Even I can get the critters now, with my go faster aerodynamic (it has holes) critter splitter, and it’s such fun, it’s like playing tennis but with mozzies, well, against them, well, actually using them like balls, only they don’t bounce, or ping across the room, or make that lovely popping noise you get when you hit the ball really well.

Now you might think I’m being cruel, and I generally don’t like killing creepy crawlies, poor things, but when it comes to mozzies, especially when you have fifteen of them flitting around, it has to be us instead of them.  I just don’t want to be seen walking around with a line of red bumps where some vampiritic fly has had a five course meal with starters and desert folowed by coffee and mints.  It’s not on, you know what I mean?

Oh well, enough of that, I’d better go and pour another mug of tea and get on with some of the orders that I have, I may even take some photos….although I could have a problem there – but I’ll tell you about that another day.

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